Hi James,
Great to hear from you. Yes, it does sound like we may have a common ancestor if we go back to John Ross Lambert Annesley (1854-1914).
From the comments in this post, it appears your father was Simon R Annesley (b. 1963), son of Roger John Lambert Annesley (b. 1922) and Margaret Marshall (married 1957).
In turn, Roger was the son of Winston Ross Annesley (b. 1889 in Ireland) and Martha Wade (married 1916).
Winston was the fourth child of John Ross Lambert Annesley (1854-1914) and Harriett Mary McConnell (1860-1916). He had three older sisters and two younger siblings but, unfortunately, they both died in infancy. Winston served in WWI in the 4th Hussars and after the war ended up operating a taxi cab. He and Martha are listed in the 1939 Register, together with one other family member (censored out), but I am assuming this would be Roger’s older sister Patricia Audrey who only married in 1941.
Now, John Ross Lambert Annesley seems to be an interesting person. He appears to be the great grandson on the 1st Earl of Annesley, but this connection could only be through one of the Earl’s illegitimate sons as the title passed to the Earl’s brother upon his death, as he had no legitimate heirs. This is the one connection I have not yet found proof for, although one of the 1st Earl’s older bastard sons has the right name and could well have been the ‘missing link’ as John Ross Lambert Annesley’s grandfather. This is the one piece of evidence I would love to find!
John Ross entered the Civil Service in 1875 as a clerk. On 31st July 1883 he married Harriett Mary McConnell. In 1902, he was convicted on two counts of assault on one of his daughters and spent time in Mountjoy Prison as a result. This was the end of his married life, as on being released he spent several months at a separate address to his wife Harriett before departing to South Africa. It is interesting to note that he gave his contact address in South Africa as c/- A McConnell – I wonder if this was a relative of Harriett? My grandmother told the story that poor old John Ross turned to the bottle, which may have led to both his misdemeanours that put him in Mountjoy Prison, as well as his death as a pauper.
For the record, my connection is through Winston’s oldest sister Dora Irene Lambert Annesley.
Anyway, if the information above lines up regards your lineage, I would be happy to continue the conversation and share what I know.
Regards,
Rex